Sunday, July 04, 2004
An Old West Fourth!
The top story in our little local paper, the Lamar Daily Snooze (Not Its Real Actual Name), was a good one Friday. It detailed the excitements listed on a poster for the 1909 Fourth of July celebration for a REALLY small neighboring town, Two Buttes. (Population these days about 12.) How far we have fallen.
The day was to get off to a rousing start with cannon firing, dynamite and the shooting of anvils. The clone and I spent some time wondering about that last. Was it for the sound, or was it a primitive form of Russian Roulette, where those attending got cheap thrills by being the ones NOT hit by the ricocheting bullets?
Some unnamed professional yakker was to give an opening address at 1 pm, but those willing to endure same would have had first crack at THREE barrels of ICE COLD lemonade.
Much sweaty fun was promised by the offering of various contests: boys pony race, mule race, cow pony race, bronco busting, motor cycle race, fat man's race (!), ladies pony race, free for all foot race, boys foot race, sack race and potato race, not to mention a proposed baseball game of the team from Two Buttes against all comers.
Here's where it really gets fun. This poster was clearly displayed at the time, and some typical independent-minded Westerner saw fit to add onto it. Beside the part assuring people there would plenty of shade for picnics is the penciled note, "I don't know where at. Bring your parasol."
In case people hadn't yet had enough fun during the day, there was to be a Big Dance too, starting at 6:30 pm and lasting until 6 AM, at which point a breakfast was offered!
Of course there were to be fireworks, "*$200* worth of the best assorted fireworks ever displayed in this section of the state." Plus "Some ten to fifteen 10 foot balloons will be sent up at this time."
Man. If I ever run into anyone with a working time machine, I'm going to go check it out!
The day was to get off to a rousing start with cannon firing, dynamite and the shooting of anvils. The clone and I spent some time wondering about that last. Was it for the sound, or was it a primitive form of Russian Roulette, where those attending got cheap thrills by being the ones NOT hit by the ricocheting bullets?
Some unnamed professional yakker was to give an opening address at 1 pm, but those willing to endure same would have had first crack at THREE barrels of ICE COLD lemonade.
Much sweaty fun was promised by the offering of various contests: boys pony race, mule race, cow pony race, bronco busting, motor cycle race, fat man's race (!), ladies pony race, free for all foot race, boys foot race, sack race and potato race, not to mention a proposed baseball game of the team from Two Buttes against all comers.
Here's where it really gets fun. This poster was clearly displayed at the time, and some typical independent-minded Westerner saw fit to add onto it. Beside the part assuring people there would plenty of shade for picnics is the penciled note, "I don't know where at. Bring your parasol."
In case people hadn't yet had enough fun during the day, there was to be a Big Dance too, starting at 6:30 pm and lasting until 6 AM, at which point a breakfast was offered!
Of course there were to be fireworks, "*$200* worth of the best assorted fireworks ever displayed in this section of the state." Plus "Some ten to fifteen 10 foot balloons will be sent up at this time."
Man. If I ever run into anyone with a working time machine, I'm going to go check it out!
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